Thursday, Jan 15 2009 - Just Waking Up
View CATHY247's food & exercise for this day
It is the coldest day of the year here. It is supposed to get to the high of 29 degrees. It snowed last night but it wasn't much. I looked out the window and it looked like someone took a sifter and lightly dusted the lawns and the housetops. I was actually dreaming about snow in my warm cozy waterbed. I had a brand new Charger car and people were skidding on the ice all over the place and I was just confidently driving my new car. Than all of a sudden I was standing on the side of a mountain road. I also dreamed I was at a school and we were making art projects. I was sitting on the floor and a group of Native Americans dressed in their full regalia walked in and started singing and chanting in their language. All of a sudden this one man in the group shouted out the word"Tequila". Then I shouted it back even louder "Tequila". There was this group of people all around me, and I was so embarassed because I was the only one that shouted, than I started giggling in my sleep and woke up. Wow, that so completely off the subject of weight loss. I am losing weight, but very slowly, as I always do . I have been on so many diets throughout the decades of my life. I think my body just says"you got to be kidding,you are still trying to lose weight". " Ha I will show you, if you really, really want to lose weight you will have to work your arse off for it because I am going to take my time". I like the calorie counting better than trying to count points on WW, for me it seems more logical and not so restricting. The other day I ate a Snickers ice cream bar with my work friends and didn't feel guity one bit, it was in my calorie range. I would have never done that with WW. I would have thought oh that is 10p oints, half of my point allowance for the day, than I would have felt deprived and lonely. But I ate it and felt accepted and one of the group. OMG, I just seen the psychological warfare I put myself in because of food. Food is food, but it can be so psychologically entwined into our complex lives that we live in. I am at heart a vegetarian, I did that lifestyle for 6 months. But I felt so alone and strange ; I live in the heartland of America, everyone loves their meat and potatoes here. I started eating chicken again, than other meats. But I close my mind to the suffering these animals had to go through for me to eat them. Ok I am going to quit rambling for today. Onward!