Friday, Jul 1 2011 - July 1 -- It's a brave new world
View CECILY55's food & exercise for this day
I am pretty sure I have "BINGE EATING DISORDER" or BED.There, I've said it. I'm not proud of this, but I suppose it's better to admit the problem as opposed to ignoring it. When do I binge? When I'm home alone and I have stuff to do that I don't want to do -- like housework, schoolwork, anything. I binge on food, on surfing, on TV, on shopping -- anything that distracts me from doing stuff. Bingeing lets me "zone out" so I don't have to think about what I need to think about.
Okay, so now what. First I am going to work on paying attention to my binge addiction (BA). When do I first feel the urge, what am I thinking when I feel that seductive pull to do something that is essentially nothing. Second, what can I do to about it. Third, and probably most important, I am going to fight my "perfectionist" tendancies and strive for mediocrity -- it's much harder to fail when my sights are set low.
About five minutes ago I sat down and had the urge to fool around on the internet. Or maybe eat even though I'm not hungry. So what am I avoiding? I really don't want to clean the pantry or put stuff away. I have some serious internal tension/anxiety about this -- mostly, I think, because... Because what? Why don't I want to do these simple chores? Well, now what? I think I'm going to have a nice, quiet cup of tea and relax, and I am going to think about what my real problem is.