Thursday, Jun 24 2004
View LYNNABEL's food & exercise for this day
Its been busy here at my second job, and when its busy I want to quit. I mean, I want to quit more than usual. I got two calls from the recruiter working with N on the position I interviewed for. She said in one that I was best qualified candidate so far and in the next one that their last interview is tomorrow and hopefully she will be calling me on Monday for either a second interview or with an offer. Wow. I haven't really processed that information yet. I suppose because it isn't final. I'd rather not even get to close to thinking about it in concrete terms until I know for sure. But, if I am offered the position and if I accept the offer, I will be quitting the dealership immediately. Moving to a position that is much more clock-conscious will be a big change for me. But, as I said to S, any job change is going to be a big adjustment for me. There is simply no other job out there with the kind of schedule flexibility of my current one. And its still not worth it! IF I were offered...and IF I accepted...I would ask to start at 8:30 and then I would begin working out at night so that I could take a shower in the evening and just get up, do my hair, get dressed, make coffee and run. In that scenario I could probably sleep until 7:15 if not 7:30. That would be great! And then I'd had a lunch break to run errands, and then I'd be home around 6. Work out, eat dinner, putz, shower, and have a great evening. I could definitely live with that. Especially with a salary increase. IF and IF, I'm going to ask for mid XX's. I'm fairly certain I would at least make what my two jobs earn now, if not more just factoring in less expensive health care insurance.
I've had so many wedding thoughts lately - fun thoughts that involve details and creative things. Planning. I asked S if he would look at the ceremony and invites this weekend to give input. And I told him today I would like a bouquet. He has seemed receptive to my ideas, but I will honest and say that I am scared to talk to him about this stuff for fear he will shoot any ideas down. I need to be honest with him, but I am nervous. Especially since this is new territory for me - being girly about the wedding.
So, I want a bouquet, and I think I'd like to have Steph, and the moms have coursages, and maybe boutinieres for S and D. And, I saw at MIchaels an arch - with tulle and greenery for only 19.95. I thought that was a great deal. I'm going to talk to S about all of this this weekend. I've got the bug and want to get stuff done now. I got a list running and will probably even get some things tomorrow after lunch with Bridget.
I had dozens of "voila" thoughts last night reading "Appetites" by Caroline Knapp. Many of the thoughts were in "Wasted" but less general. I kept thinking, No wonder I struggle so much. No wonder women struggle so much. Never, in the history of the world, have we had as much freedom of choice as we have today. No wonder its overwhelming. In fact, I can't believe we haven't completely lost our collective mind. I guess that could be argued...but - its a testament to how versatile women are that we can adapt (albeit with growing pains) to a change only 40 years old after millenia of oppression/repression/limited choice. This stuff should be taught to girls in school.
I just ate far too much pizza and how I feel anxious and frustrated with myself. Good grief.