Thursday, Oct 28 2004
View LYNNABEL's food & exercise for this day
We are having potluck here at work today so Iím feeling antsy Ė as if something is happening today, which it is, but not in the same way I feel. I just get feelings, sometimes, that something is going to HAPPEN. This feeling isnít necessarily accurate in predicting that something WILL happen, but it makes me feel unsettled non the less.
I have a lot of anxiety of a few projects at work, but I am doing so much better at managing the anxiety. Iím still bothered but not to the panick-y extent I would have been not long ago. Iím working with the Feeling Good workbook, but I donít k now that I can attribute the improvement totally to that. Today may just be a good day. (Thatís an example of ďDiscounting the PositiveĒ!) LOL.
Lots of love in my house Ė S and the puppy and the kitties. I donít know what makes me feel better Ė the puppy sheer excitement when I get home or Sís hugs and kisses when I walk in the door. Ripple had an accident last night (just pee) and itís the third night in row of this for her. She is ahead of other puppies with so many things, so its hard for us to figure out if this is to be expected or if there is a problem. She is taken outside virtually each hour at night when weíre home so its not that she hasnít been able to go. She also has been going 4-5 hours during the day without peeing, so its not as if her little bladder canít hold it. S thinks its to get back at Fatty (one of the cats), but Iím not sure that it is. I think Ripple is just a puppy and gets so excited when both S and I are home together and doesnít really know what to do with herself. I truly think sheíll grow out of it, but we both agonize over the accidents. She is sleeping in the mud room now at night from about 10pm to 5:20am when I get up and let her outside. I wish she slept better in our room, but she doesnít. I just worry that she is in the mud room during the day Ė she should havenít to be in there at night.
I got a call from Stephanie last night that she ran into A in NYC in a store. What a small world. She said that A said she had just seen me and that I looked like a million bucks and seemed very happy.
Okay, I am anxious about work. I suppose I should stop writing this and see what there is I can do. Iím at a stopping point (canít go further point) with all my project. S always talks about hating to rely on other people Ė and often I can see why he expresses the feeling/frustration that way. It is hard to have to rely on other people to do your job, run your country, be in traffic with you, etc.
A side note Ė and this may be TMI so read with caution. My nipples are still not functioning the way they should Ė and by should I mean in sexual sense, not in a lactating sense (obviously). My breasts have always been wonderfully sensitive but they are just not working/responding right. I would think they would be back to normal since its been almost six months since my breast reduction surgery. It makes me sad. Iíve heard both that both increased and decreased sensitivity is normal for B/R surgery, but I had hoped to be in the increased category if anything.
Why am I almost teary?