too hard?

DANCER - 6:03AM UTC, Jun 26th 2010

yes I really think this is too hard. For 4 weeks I thought this is a synch, I can do this, 4lb dropped off, wasn't too hard, 4 weeks later that 4 lbs has returned, I have exercised consistently diary completed and usuallly in the green, but no progress. Additionally, I thought I had overcome the loathing of my naked body, but hey no not so. Still the loathing, keeping it covered I don't want to see it and make sure I don't.

So I think the first thing I need to accomplish on this weight loss journey is to get over the self loathing. Because it maybe that is my reason for trying to lose weight. i.e. if I was slim I would like my body naked. In clothes, I am more than half way with approval rating, just depending what angle I catch myself in reflection. This sounds so shallow when people have real problems. I am a nurse and I know about people's real problems. However, I've said it then on one level I do love my health, my ability to work fulltime, and night duties and to still function giving to my family and friends and in particular my aging mum. But on anaother level I can't see past the outward bodily image of myself. This is stupid, as I write this, I am actually appalled that I am still stuck in this place.

Anyway, I have shared it and perhaps that may be the beginning to acceptance of this body, which works very well, its just a larger version than I want but at least I'm here, functioning, lovable and loving in return and also there for my friends and family and patients. Its astonishing that this is holding me up, so I am going to work on this imbalance for a few weeks and really try hard to work through some issues. I'm long enough in the tooth to be able to conquer this and really once I do I think then I will be in a better space to really take on more challenges.
Hoping others out there have some good advice, thanks for reading.

SPEECHFREAK - 3:38AM UTC, Aug 20th 2010


Hey Dancer, It sounds like things are looking up for you. Whenever a negative thought of any kind enters your head, say to yourself..."and what's the good news"? There is always something positive in any situation. When the negative thought is about your body, you can lessen the impact by telling yourself something good about your body. Maybe you have a great smile, your eyes twinkle, your head doesn't hurt, etc. Best wishes to you!

BOHARA - 3:31PM UTC, Jul 7th 2010

New Albany, Indiana

You may want to read Geneen Roth's new book, Women, God, and Food (or that title
may list those things in a different order...Women, Food, and God).
Anyway, I found it to be helpful with the self image stuff....

Let me know what you think.... ( I think I need to reread it...)

Barbara (the librarian....)

SALLY1 - 12:10AM UTC, Jul 2nd 2010


Thanks for your comment on my blog. I was not even aware that anybody was reading it.
Hang in there. Just stick to the basics. Follow the guidelines that CK sets for calories and exercise and it WILL start working. I find it is really critical to log all my food and to even plan ahead so that I do not exceed the recommended calories by too much. The first few weeks are rough, but as you keep going it does get easier and you are defintely worth it.
(trying to become the ex-queen of yo-yo dieters)

Last Edited: 12:11am UTC, July 2nd 2010

DADDYZGIRL - 1:35AM UTC, Jul 1st 2010

Phoenix, Az. 85044

Dancer, are you drinking enough water? I thin you just need to do something to get out of the standstill. I know what your going thru, but negative thoughts brings negative results! I knonw when I work out, I say to myself, "my fat is melting off " , it takes 7 times for you to say it for your brain to comprehend! Just keep say it to yourself!
hugs to you & stay strong,beleive & have faith! :heart2:
God Bless You!
Daddyzgirl :heart2:

TLJ - 5:03PM UTC, Jun 27th 2010

Dear Dancer: Thanks for the cyber hug and I hope things improve for you. I like the yoga CD (you can get them at your library for free to try it out) because it's private and easy and you can go at your own pace to avoid injuries. Good luck.

DANCER - 12:18AM UTC, Jun 27th 2010

thank you - I have not tried those ideas, but I will, that sounds good. It amazes me now thinking it through that I have not tried positive things about my negative behaviour towards my body but have concentrated on changing the eating behaviour. It seems obvious to me now that I need to work on the negative body image. I have been eating healthy for ages (and overeating healthy too) and have ramped up the exercise and regularly now walk and a little running plus Zumba is a regular now on a Wed night. So, now I turn my attention to this important issue.
Thanks so much for your comment it means a lot - truly. I think this new journey will be life changing, and I have been thinking recently that yoga and meditation could benefit me but havn't taken that step to try it......a bit lazy on that one......
and I think I feel that cyber hug, and hug back!

TLJ - 9:54PM UTC, Jun 26th 2010

Dear Dancer:
Isn't "get over the self-loathing" a vague goal that requires you to change how you feel? Is it a fair goal? Is it fair to expect to control feelings? The heart feels what it feels. I do believe it is possible to choose behavior--what I do about my feelings. It's sort of like not blaming myself for the weather but choosing to use an umbrella when it's raining. So I avoid making goals about controlling feelings; but I do make specific goals about controlling behavior.
Have you tried: (1) making a list of five things you like about your body as it is now, (2) putting the list where you will see it every day and (3) mentally reviewing the list when you catch yourself having self-loathing thoughts. I also find doing gentle yoga with mediation has helping to reduce a negative self image issue. Good luck.