When you first tell people you’re going to lose weight, chances are you get a response something along the lines of: "But you’re great just the way you are!" While that’s kind, it would be better for you to hear something like: "Well, I like you however you are, but I’m glad you want to make some changes and take better care of yourself. What can I do to help?" When someone says instead that you should "quit worrying about your weight" they are - intentionally or not - sabotaging your goals.

Sabotage can be understood as anything anybody says or does to actively discourage you from achieving your weight goals. 

When someone sabotages your goals it's often because that person is uncomfortable with the changes you're making. When you make a change, it can threaten another person's "comfort zone", particularly if that person is close to you. They may want – consciously or not – to prevent or undo a change, and the result is sabotage. Common things others may say to sabotage your goal include:

• "You don't need to lose weight – you look great!"
• "Come on, have just one more drink."
• "Stop being so selfish. You don't need to go to the gym. Spend time with me instead."
• "Gee honey, you were so good this week, you deserve a treat, let's go out for ice cream."
• "I slaved over this homemade, deep-fried, chocolate-covered pie just for you, so you have to eat another piece."
• "I'm not on the diet; you are. So why should I suffer? I want to have ice cream, cake and cookies in the house."

Sabotage can also stem from a lack of knowledge about your goals, a lack of empathy for what you are trying to achieve, or simple jealousy at your determination to improve your body and health.