Dieting is funny. I've been dieting for the past 10 years, since I was 15, and am now 10 lbs heavier than when I began- which goes to show the effectiveness of dieting.

My first expedition in dieting began when Atkins was still a somewhat new idea and I thought my 15year old body should be 120 lbs like all my friends instead of my "fat" 135 lb frame. In one month I lost 10 lbs eating bacon and eggs every morning for breakfast and just protien galore with no thought to the fat content or balance or ANYthing. I just went by the book. However, I didn't eat either bacon, sausage OR eggs for MONTHS afterward- I was so sick of them!

Of course I made no lifestyle changes and gained the weight right back.

I wasn't really a serial dieter but would maybe once a year till college when I just stopped eating and lost quite a bit of weight and half on my hair as well. After my hair loss fiasco I stopped dieting altogether and vowed to make lifestyle changes to make it last.

After leaving college and my college life and all my friends there, the stress of facing real life and not knowing what the future held and getting my first bonified desk job packed on the pounds and my "freshman ten" was postponed and doubled to the "graduate 20." And those stuck to me like super glue.

Then, 3 years ago, I moved to China to teach and share the love of Jesus and it became a little easier. My active lifestyle and more natural eating lost a few pounds at first but I gained some back when I began major binging and purging episodes prompted by loneliness and my now ex-boyfriend breaking up with me long distance.

Finally, I did manage to ease into a very healthy lifestyle of natural foods and whole grains, limited meat and lots of fresh fruits and veggies. I was quite proud of how far I had come healthwise and how I got down to my average college weight of 145.

But now, at 146 and 30% body fat, I know that I must get past that platau and have more than a "decent" body shape and health. I want to be fantastic! and stunning! I want to have more energy and fit into the chinese sizes here without searching high and low. I want to have a taut, smooth stomach and legs that don't jiggle.

I want to prepare a nice "bride body" before the fall when my superman and I say, "I Do" and he sees all of me for the first time. He says my health and shape are "ok" and I don't need to worry. I think he said that as a means to comfort me but it only motivated me to get in better shape. He loves me at my current size and said I didn't have to change but I want him to look and me and think, "wow, how did I get such a knockout?" I want his friends to be jealous.

And he's such a big encourager for all my endeavors. I am blessed.

Another equally motivating factor is that we plan to have kids asap and I really want to get in the best shape I can before hand so I can have an easier pregnancy and bounce back more quickly. I want my current weight to be my "heavy weight" and must whip myself into shape before hand for this to happen.

SO...

I am doing the South Beach Diet because I am ADDICTED to sugar in EVERY form, bread, pasta, fruit, icecream, chocolate, etc. and I think if I can have the discipline to deny myself for 2 weeks and break my sugar cravings then I think that it will be a lot easier to continue on a weight loss track. Also, the added bonus of losing 8-15 lbs in those 2 weeks is a definate boost of moral.

My current weight is 146 and my end goal is 120. I plan to take about 12 weeks and be at my ideal shape by August 1st. If I lose 8 lbs in 2 weeks and 4 more lbs the following 2 weeks, then I will be at 134 by July 9 when I go to my good friend's wedding and also see my ex (who will attend) and many college friends.

Today was day 1. I ate ate ate and planned to eat more to get in enough calories but I was just so stuffed and bloated that I couldn't finish eating all the food I had planned. I had energy (probably due to the coffee) and a good mood and a great exercise session. I am looking forward to day 2!