So I am considering myself lucky... I mean, VERY lucky. Apparently news hasn't really gotten around too far that today is my last day so no big... 'I can't believe you're leaving!!' or, 'hey , everybody, it's Rebekah's last day!!' I like this whole sneaking out thing. It's kind of fun. Don't get me wrong. I am not shy by any leans but I still don't like being the absolute center of attention. I heard that snort Matthew.

I did get some very thoughtful gifts today. One of the ladies out on the production floor had a friend crochet a baby blanket! It is so beautiful. It is light blue with a white scalloped edge. I just love homemade afghans... It's really our first baby gift! How exciting!!

Then the 2 guys I pal around at work with the most and their wives pitched in and gave us a gift card to Build A Bear and a recording sound box so that you can put a wave file of the baby's heart beat into a stuffed bear and when you squeeze it's paw you will hear the heart beat. It doesn't get any cuter than that.

Our next ultrasound is not for 9 more weeks but now we have a fun project to look forward to.... Plus the mall that Build A Bear is in here is my favorite place to shop!! It's mostly outdoor shops and restaurants so hopefully we can catch a really nice spring day to walk and eat and make out own little heart beat bear.

I had a rough couple of days for some reason but I am feeling better today. Maybe a decent night's sleep in my own bed helped. I swear that fresh fruit seems to calm my stomach too. Sounds odd, but last night I had a romaine salad with strawberries and blueberries and dried cranberries with no dressing and it tasted really refreshing. I am glad that I am not craving too much crap necessarily. The worst cravings are for comfort foods like mashed potatos and turkey... or homemade mac and cheese. Stuff that if I watch my serving sizes I should be OK with.

A girlfriend of mine who is due in April is having trouble with blood sugar right now and may have to go on bed rest. She has been craving a lot of sweets. I am glad that part of me is too scared about getting sick to go too far overboard with the sweets. and Matty is very helpful. He teases about the quantity of food I have been consuming but really only steps on my toes if I am eating too many sweets. I love him so much that sometimes I think my heart is going to burst.

Everytime I daydream about Matt and I and a baby I get so misty eyed... Spending these last few days with my Mom has been calmly reassuring... She has told me many times that she is so happy for Matt and I and cannot imagine a man who would be a better father than Matt. My Mom does not give out compliments casually either. So it means a lot. I asked her, do you think he'll be as interested in a newborn as a toddler? She said he would absolutely be in love with the baby as soon as he lays eyes on it. I know these things, it just makes me so proud to hear my Mom say it.

Speaking of my angel... he has enough done upstairs that he wants to get at least one coat of paint on this weekend!! So exciting!! We need to get as much of the walls done as we can so we can get the floor in. Then we will move onto our room. It's actually not in as bad of shape as far as smoothing the walls and all... but we have so much more furniture in there to move out and rearrange that it is still going to be a general pain in the butt... When Matt paints I will sleep downstairs just to be safe. Ick. sleepin' on the couch. That's almost as bad as the doghouse.

I don't know how a life so disorganized and feeling so unsettled like mine did only a few years ago feel so perfect now... I am so glad that I married Matt when I did and that I waited to have a little one a little later in life. I know we always wonder... what if... we had met earlier?? ...we hadn't been married before?? But you know what? It all works out for the best. I can't imagine if I had had a child in my first marriage or hadn't experienced the heart ache of that first marriage. I just would not have been the same me. The me that understands better what is most important in life. I am in the best place I could ever be right now and only by the grace of God.

I miss running for a lot of reasons but one for sure was the time to myself where often my thoughts would wander to thanking God for the miraculous life that I am blessed with. I don't feel guilt about not running lately... seriously I have felt pretty bad and now that I am feeling better, the cold and ice isn't so friendly... but I will at least start walking in the mornings starting Monday and maybe work back into some slow jogs as much as I can. The warmth of spring is not too far around the corner and the thought of spending leisurely evenings working in the flower beds and grilling out is about as pleasant as they get...

I'm a little rambly and reflective today but I am liking it. So bear with me, my cyber friends.. each of you means so much to me I only wish I could tell you all in person.

For my last day lunch I am meeting my brother Jeremy for coffee. He called earlier and it sounded like a great plan. Maybe a little soup for this cold, yet sunny afternoon...

I better get going... I will check in about the new job as soon as I can! I will miss you all until then!
B