I decided to forget about trying to eat anything else last night and just went to bed. I slept for 11 hours and I feel all back to normal.

Today I have my second appointment with my personal trainer. She said not to work out before hand so I will get a late workout today. I will have to eat lunch before I go. But I don't like to do that. Maybe I'll just have a good snack, instead?

I decided to do the mature, responsible thing and put our rental house up for sale. I sooooo didn't want to do that (pride), but making two house payments while unemployed will have an interesting effect upon our finances (real life). I really hope that I get a lease on it before it sells! There was another showing yesterday but the realor didn't leave any feedback, yet. My tennants are supposed to be out next Sunday but I have not received confirmation. They were having SO MANY problems getting their house built and sooo many delays. I really do feel bad for them. They seriously thought that they would be out of the house by mid-January. Isn't it like almost May? Yikes...

I am just a few small pounds away from not being a 300 lb woman, anymore. I am very excited about that. I'm hoping the scale will go below 304 today. I can lose three pounds in one week and I am going to try hard for it, too. I wanted to be at 300 (or under) by the end of the month. I can do this! It's going to happen!

*****HAPPY DAYS*****

Okay, so I went to the trainer and she did all kinds of measurements and calculating, and so on and so forth. This is very interesting:

My lean body mass is 177 lbs.
My current BMI is 41
My ideal body weight, at 22% fat is 227 Lbs.

Now, I have to say I have been suspect about charts, graphs, ranges, male/female differences, normal ranges my whole adult life...I feel vindicated. I am 5'10 tall, my wrist measures 7.75", I wear size 12 shoes, and at 304 lbs can snugly wear a size 20 pant. At 250 lbs I was in a size 16. I see lots of other people here who wear much larger sizes than I do at the same weights. There is no way that I can get to 125 lbs, which is what the fat doctors of my youth advised my parents.

CK says my ideal weight range is 140 - 174. I thought 175 was stretching it for me, now it is confirmed. I'd have to lose every ounce of body fat, along with three pounds of lean mass to get there! My trainer says that I only need to lose about another 75 lbs, half of what I thought I had to lose. So, basically, I am not going to get too excited about it. I will keep losing and firming and building until I feel I am at a good spot.

So this brings me to my little "dilema" if you will. I just finished my 10th week of calorie watching/restriction and exercise. I have averaged 3.5 lbs. per week of weight loss. That is high. But, I *am* big. So, I think that I should change my profile to reflect that I am a male (as my body composition more closely resembles a male) and see what kind of calorie recommendations it gives me. Buuuuuutttt....I only have 1.25 lbs left to lose until I reach my first main goal of 300 lbs. so I think I will wait to tinker with my calories until I acheive that goal.

Me thinks me 177 pounds of lean mass requires more calories or it will go bye-bye.

Okay, so I tried to change my profile to Male and the calories didn't change?????
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I took the age quiz in SANDGEE's blog. It said I am 31 at heart. I'm actually going to be 30 next month....I guess you can say that my heart, mind, body and soul are all in alignment? LOL.