My mother left early this morning. Where is the halle-fuc-king-lujah emoticon when you need one?

As usual, my son came back 10+ pounds heavier (in three weeks), "addicted" to TV and...oh my gawd...I just need to stop right now before I get myself pissed off all over, again.

On a slightly less-pissier note, I just got back from my second pre-natal appointment. It seems I gained slightly over two pounds this last month (after the 12 pounds I lost the prior three months). My midwife seemed not too happy about it (she thought it was too much) and gave me some nutritional advice that was questionable, at best. If any of you can figure out how I can consume about 3000 calories per day while only having 80 grams of protein, and limiting my fruits to two servings a day and my carbohydrates to three servings per day, I'd absolutely LOVE to hear from you. <insert quacking duck emoticon here> Even eating a wheelbarrow full of vegetables every day would cause me to exceed her recommended carb level.

You know, someday I may actually have something pleasant to write in this blog, again.