An interesting thought has been going through my mind this week. This week, I had a colonoscopy. While I was adhering to the clear liquid diet, I thought, how is it that I am following this diet, but when I need to stick to my regular plan, I am so easily distracted. During Lent, if I give up something, I stick to it. 40 days of no sweets. . . and I do it. But starting off any day with a plan, it seems to fall by the way side. What is it about me that I can be compliant in some circumstances, but in others, I'm not.

The only difference I can see is that I can not hold myself accountable to making a committment to a healthier lifestyle.

I've always thought when I see someone on TV look at themselves and they discover something that has been holding them back or keeping them from being successful. . . well I've thought, that's not me. . . I do not emotionally eat, I was not abused as a child, I haven't had tragic things happen in my life. . . . but now I am wondering. What is stopping me from being successful? Is there something inside of me that stops me from being accountable to myself, being accountable for my actions, for my choices, or is it what I've always thought . . . live in the moment - diet or exercise tomorrow. Enjoy today and worry about it tomorrow.

Is this all just about self discipline and holding myself accountable or is it something else?