8:15pm
BAH! Why can't college kids like healthier stuff! So I'm having a floor meeting tomorrow and decided to just get candy for it because it's easier. I have proceeded to eat, two starburst, two minature crunches, a reese minature, and a butterfinger minature! I mean granted, I'm still under 1600 cals eaten for the day, but I still feel so icky! One thing I don't like about working out in the morning is - by the end of the day - I feel like my workout was nothing and that I've totally screwed it up by eating. Well, maybe eating candy does screw it up but I still at least miss that post-workout gratification in the middle of the day that i actually did work out. Oh well. Contrary to what I said earlier, I'm going to weigh tomorrow AM just to see how far/close i am to being back at 218. Hopefully I'm at 219 but ya know we'll see. I strawberry starbursts. They are so good. I kinda want two more but I know i shouldn't eat anymore candy. I probably shoulda waited til tomorrow to buy it but I didn't know how much time I'd have. Such is life! I Candy.

So I got a phone call today and Res Services wants to know if I'd be interested in being a Summer CA which would be a great opportunity but that would mean I couldn't work as much in my other job. My best friend thinks that the extra money I'd make over the summer would be far more beneficial in the meantime since I've been struggling with money than to do this job for experience but I dunno. Any thoughts? I think I'm going to turn to the forums for some advice.

Anywho, I need to stay out of my room and AWAY from the candy so I don't feel compelled to scarf more down.
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Guess what crazy MF got up and went to workout at 7 this AM?! You guessed it: ME!

Today is going to be an uber busy day and I really wanted to get a workout in before dinner but I knew it wouldn't happen so last night I decided that I might as well get up a little earlier than usual and go to the gym! This AM, I cursed the alarm, "now, why the f*** am I getting up? Take your crazy a$$ to sleep" but I knew that I really wasn't that tired and I should just get my a$$ up and that's what I did! I actually had a really enjoyable experience too. I don't know if I can make it habit because I'm not sure how it will affect my body, but I liked it. It's not as competitive as it is in the afternoon and everyone is kinda just doing their thing and that was cool. We'll see though. I had another great run today that was POST-Arc Trainer. After my 45 mins on the Arcy, I did 25 mins on the tready and ran for 20 minutes straight today. I'm loving my new increase in stamina. I'm also ing running! I'm learning that a lot of running is mental, and sometimes I psych myself out that I'm tired when I'm really just "tired" of running. I'm loving proving all these new things to myself!

While i was on the Arcy I was "reading" the new People with all the 100lb losers and whatever and oddly, I wasn't as inspired as i thought. I was actually fairly aggravated. Mostly because #1)I couldn't really relate to any of the women, #2)they didn't really detail their plan as much as I would have liked, and #3) I was aggravated by this idea of "skinny". Every single women in there was like 132 - 150 and I was annoyed because my goal weight is 170-180. To me, that's "skinny". So when I get to my goal weight and I start selling my body for money , am I not going to be skinny enough to be featured? I'll be boastful when I get to my goal weight and I don't care; i told my brother, i'm selling my story to Tyra (i've always wanted to meet Tyra) because I'm going to be DAMN proud! But will I be turned away because I'm not 150 or 160? F*** that! If anything, when I do get to my goal weight, I want to show people that you don't have to be 130/140 to have the "perfect body". If you feel good, that's all that matters and dammit that's all that should freakin matter. Our society is just so damn skinny-conscious and it's annoying! I'm not skinny and I'm in better shape than some skinny people! I'm in better shape than my 180lb football-playing brothers (Well, cardio shape) so I don't give a damn what these skinny stalkers have to say. I'll kick your ass anyday.

Anywho, as you can see, my workout put me in a diva mood today (maybe more incentive to go work out in the AMs). So here's the schedule today:

7:30 - 8:45 Workout
9:00 - 12:00 Work
12:15 - 1:05 Class
1:05 - 2:00 Lunch
2:15-3:55 Class
4:00 - 5:15 Group Project Meeting
6:00 - 8:00 Staff Meeting

Now that I write it out, it doesn't look that busy, but I said it's busy dammit so that's what it's gonna be!

I didn't weigh today!! I will Wednesday though so I can determine if I wanna weigh in Thursday or Friday. I'm cheating, i know, but this weekend was so bad I have to make myself feel better about myself SOMEHOW!

Anywho, I'm gonna get to work aka websurfing for three hours. Have a great day Ckers!!!


::11:55AM::
I think I pulled my butt.