LOVE2RUN's CalorieKing blog
Tuesday, Mar 10 2009 - It's more than just about the weight...
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The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own self - Montaigne
I started this journey because I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to be proud of who I am; but I'm learning that takes so much more than losing weight and being healthy.
A recent Forum touched on how annoying it is when your working out and someone laughs at you (HALFTHEMAN). My first response was self-preservation. It hurts to be laughed at, I would want to get away and/or avoid the person/situation in the future. HALFTHEMAN responded with words to the effect, that he is not working out for them. He is working for himself. Their negative opinion will not affect his performance. He'll continue working and they can laugh all they want, because he feels good about himself and what he is doing; therefore, their opinion does not mater.
I read his words, and those of others who responded to the Forum topic, and I realized that in order to be proud of who I am, I must continue to evolve. It's about more than just losing the weight. Little things, little comments, dirty looks, or snickers made at my expense, they devastate me. I crumble. I want so much to make others happy, to support and build, I just can't understand the cruelty. They don't care if they hurt me, if anything they feed off my pain. I learned from the topic that I need to evolve. If I want others to respect me, then first I must respect myself.
In a prior blog, I wrote about my negative voice which I named Mary. I promised to silence Mary when she started in on my faults. I would not let Mary talk that way to my loved ones, so Mary cannot talk that way to me. It's time to silence the real negative people. I feel good about my progress. I'm proud of what I'm doing. The negative people are ugly inside. I don't like them. I don't care about them. I come first.
I'm sure just like losing weight, this will take time, practice, learning, and failing, yet never giving up. I have a goal. I will evolve. Thank you CK and the people of CK, I'm learning so much, it's not just about losing the weight.
I started this journey because I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to be proud of who I am; but I'm learning that takes so much more than losing weight and being healthy.
A recent Forum touched on how annoying it is when your working out and someone laughs at you (HALFTHEMAN). My first response was self-preservation. It hurts to be laughed at, I would want to get away and/or avoid the person/situation in the future. HALFTHEMAN responded with words to the effect, that he is not working out for them. He is working for himself. Their negative opinion will not affect his performance. He'll continue working and they can laugh all they want, because he feels good about himself and what he is doing; therefore, their opinion does not mater.
I read his words, and those of others who responded to the Forum topic, and I realized that in order to be proud of who I am, I must continue to evolve. It's about more than just losing the weight. Little things, little comments, dirty looks, or snickers made at my expense, they devastate me. I crumble. I want so much to make others happy, to support and build, I just can't understand the cruelty. They don't care if they hurt me, if anything they feed off my pain. I learned from the topic that I need to evolve. If I want others to respect me, then first I must respect myself.
In a prior blog, I wrote about my negative voice which I named Mary. I promised to silence Mary when she started in on my faults. I would not let Mary talk that way to my loved ones, so Mary cannot talk that way to me. It's time to silence the real negative people. I feel good about my progress. I'm proud of what I'm doing. The negative people are ugly inside. I don't like them. I don't care about them. I come first.
I'm sure just like losing weight, this will take time, practice, learning, and failing, yet never giving up. I have a goal. I will evolve. Thank you CK and the people of CK, I'm learning so much, it's not just about losing the weight.
2 comments so far.
2.
a decade ago
You convinced me. I just went to my email account and changed my password. My previous password? URFATANDUGLY. I'd like to read about "Mary". Could you give me an idea how far back in your blogs to look for that??
by TREONUT
1.
a decade ago
i love your introspection and thoughts here! i think evolving is the underlying plan for any life change even if it's not evident.
by NANIANAKI