LOVE2RUN's CalorieKing blog
Monday, Jun 22 2009 - Fat chick freak-out
View LOVE2RUN's food & exercise for this day
Ill always be the fat chick. No matter how much weight I lose, how many different ways I style my hair, no matter what skinny clothes I wear or how much skin care, exercise or diet contraptions I invest in. Plastic surgery can nip and tuck away the excess skin, the stretch marks are carefully hidden or camouflaged; but no matter what I do
Ill always be the fat chick.
The scars remain, not only upon flesh, but upon my memory and the memories of those who knew me when. Wow! Youve lost a lot of weight havent you? Those words, which were golden once upon a time are now the constant reminder. They are always watching, always waiting for me to gain it back. They eye each and every morsel of food that goes into my mouth. They comment every time I take a break from exercise. They are there, waiting for me to gain it back with an ebullient Aha! I told you so, once a fat chick always a fat chick!!
There is no denying, no hiding the fact that once upon a time I was the fat chick. You can lose the weight, but youll never lose the label.
The scars remain, not only upon flesh, but upon my memory and the memories of those who knew me when. Wow! Youve lost a lot of weight havent you? Those words, which were golden once upon a time are now the constant reminder. They are always watching, always waiting for me to gain it back. They eye each and every morsel of food that goes into my mouth. They comment every time I take a break from exercise. They are there, waiting for me to gain it back with an ebullient Aha! I told you so, once a fat chick always a fat chick!!
There is no denying, no hiding the fact that once upon a time I was the fat chick. You can lose the weight, but youll never lose the label.
7 comments so far.
7.
a decade ago
Susan - You are beautiful~no matter what your weight is. It's just a number - we empower it! However, I can relate. I feel similarly about smoking. I will always be a smoker - eventhough I quit 4 years ago and I know that some of my 'friends' that are still smoking are waiting for me to go back to smoking. Sometimes - misery truly loves company. You are terrrifc - lose the weight for yourself - keep it off for yourself! Be the example! HUGS!
by ABLASER
6.
a decade ago
Funny, "those" people are the ones whom need to watch what "they" eat and become motivated to move more. You are beautiful. You have the skills to succeed, when out in public placing blinders on is hard to do, but it can be done. Continue to focus on the most important person, you.
by PAPERBACKNOVEL
5.
a decade ago
Howdy, Skinny minnie! Check out the National weight registry! Not only are they not fat, they have solved the whole cycle of being the "fat chic", or "fat boy."
by ANNAE
4.
a decade ago
Hi Susan!
:love:
I emailed you last week but have changed my login name since then. You are such a positive inspiration for me! Thank you so much for being so candid and sharing so much of yourself with 'stranger friends'. I saw your blog about the Bugg and had to have one! I ordered it today. I'm wondering if my body frame with so much extra fat attached to it will have a different metabolism than my upcoming newly motivated version without the excess fat? (Maybe that's a really dumb question--I'm a newbie.)
I can't believe it has taken so long for me to figure out to put myself first in life. Uh, yea... I guess it's like placing the oxygen mask on yourself first before assisting others! Ha...(funny thought--dry sense of humor).
I finally reached a point (recently) where everyday normal things were really incredibly difficult for me to accomplish without having to take MANY rests and noticing my back killing me.
So, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for being on this site... you are helping me more than you know. I'll bet that halo of yours is having some jewels added as we 'speak'!
Vicki
by TIME4CHANGE
3.
a decade ago
I think I understand what you are saying. I'm only half way to my goal and everyday I think about the extra skin and the stretchmarks. I know that I'll never wear shorts again but even so I take it one day at a time. I tell myself that I'm healthier then I was before. I'm planning to go to counseling to work though this. It might help you too. It couldn't hurt to try.
by BARB130
2.
a decade ago
I agree with Elly.
by RICK6003
1.
a decade ago
Wow Susan, I am sorry that you feel that way. I wish I could give you a hug.
:queen:
I once upon a time used to think that I was the fat sister, so although I understand how you feel and understand the concept behind why you feel that way, it makes me sad to think that your heart hurts and your mind can't get past the pressures that other people put on us.
One thing that I've learned is that it has nothing to do about what anyone else thinks about me. It only has to do with what I think about myself. Counselling helps with that worldview of the self. Despite snide remarks my husband or others may make, it will always come down to the satisfaction I have with myself. Even if I gained a pound. Because its my choice to eat or exercise or not. And nobocy can take choice away from me.
You're awesome and I applaud your progress. Stay strong, let your emotions loose, and give yourself a hug, look in the mirror and say, "I am Not the fat chick" Screw what anyone else says.
You're fabulous.
Hugs,
Elly
by LENSCHER