I am happy and proud that I lost 12 pounds so far, but I am sad because I hate my job today. I asked for a couple of days off in September and I couldn't get them because other people were off. I was supposed to babysit my grandson because his babysitter is going to be off. This sucks! I had to disappoint my daughter and miss the opportunity of special time with my grandson. I am angry and crabby and I just can't get over it. It is totally my fault for not asking sooner, but it is so hard to get time off around here. I also didn't sleep well because of it.

My job is a lot boring and a lot stressful. Bad combo. I don't get paid very well either. I am a sales back-up and I have to be ready to jump in and do someone else's job and I always get no matter how hard I try. When I am not subbing, I don't have much to do.

I don't mean to unload, but ..... I took care of my Mom for 5 hours on Sunday. She has Alzheimers. She is having trouble seeing. Her brain isn't connecting to her vision, I think. I am so sad. I love my mother. I hate seeing her like this. It hurts really bad. I didn't sleep well the last two nights because of it either. I try to put it aside, but it really is very sad. I am going to lose her soon and there will be a big hole there.

I am trying to stay positive and think positive, but I just can't change my mood.

I don't have my food as a comfort anymore, either.

My husband didn't help when he bought Turkey swiss rolls from Costco and gave them to me for lunch. I guess I can eat them, but not the best.

Don't know what we'll have for dinner tonight. I was thinking of stuffing an overgrown Zucchini with beans and corn and sprinkling it with some Mexican cheese, but I don't think I am going to feel like cooking. I could have my hubby do his stuffed salmon from Costco, but I don't feel like fish. Fish is not a comfort food!

Maybe a bike ride and a veggie patty? I love those veggie patties.