OK. So I have been out of the office here for a few weeks. I missed you all. I have been sick since Christmas with a horrific cold and CK was the furthest thing from my mind. Also had lots of bdays to celebrate. The partying starts around 12/21 and doesn't end until 1/4 or so. Then I always end up with a cold. I feel that I have been very positive through the holidays. I actually had the best Holiday ever. I did so many Christmas activities with my family and didn't worry about perfect decorations and perfect food..... I enjoyed shopping and giving presents. I made and gave Christmas cards. I enjoyed people activities! It felt like I was a new person.

But how does all this good feeling translate to my weight loss? I am not sure. I think that I have been naturally feeling less like overindulging a little. I have also been feeling more "in touch" with my body because of some help from a chiropractor. But I am still struggling with weight loss and smoking too. I am on a little bit of a roller coaster ride. I think when I feel better I will be able to once again get to work on those things. In the meantime, I am not going to beat myself up, because that is what got me to where I am in the first place. I can't believe how much I have made my life a set of rules and have to's and musts. I can't believe how much I went around putting myself down and talking bad to me. It is like living a new life without the constant haranguing and it is hard to get used to. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. But I won't continue doing that to myself about my weight either. l can try to lose weight and follow the program but I cannot yell at me, put me down, chastise me or tell me I can't do it. I must be gentle with me and love me.

Good luck to everyone in the new year.