I finally figured out that I'm feeling a little blue and have been these past couple of weeks. It hit me that all the signs are there. Lack of energy, craving sweets, wanting to stay in bed all day, moping around the house not wanting to get out, all the tell tell signs of the kind of depression I get into. It started when big dog got sick and I knew he wasn't going to get any better. I guess my doctor knew best not to take me off my meds. Now since I finally figured it out, I'm going to have to pay special attention to how and what I eat for the next couple of weeks even more so. I will have a tendency to crave sweets until this passes. I told my husband tonight that I recognized the symptoms today when I crawled back into bed and was not tired. I just laid there and didn't want to get out. I guess if I had some place to go I could hide my depression a little better, but I don't. So, I thought if I make going to the gym a place I have to go every day like people who get up and have to go to work, then maybe this will help me out of this little boat of depression. Ok, it's not all about losing my dog, there are a few other things going on in my life that are bothering me. My husband and I knows what saddens my heart besides the passing of my dog. He knows the family member I hurt for and wish to wrap my arms around and express my concern for. All is not well with this member of the family. He has chosen not to be honest with us in fear we would not love him. Ah, if he only understood what real love is he wouldn't have to be afraid, but he doesn't because he doesn't understand what true love is. So I'm sitting here tonight in a darkened mood, grieving from the loss of a loved one who doesn't see me for who I am while also still grieving for a little dog who no longer is at my foot steps. I internalize a lot of my emotions as you all have come to realize.
Tomorrow I'll be better this I know, but tonight my thoughts are just kind of down and I felt if I wrote them out I would get over them a lot quicker. Thanks for the indulgence.
Lighter note, I used Turkey tenderloins tonight to make a turkey stew. The stew came out very tender and low fat. My hubby liked it better than using beef. It was not greasy and took a fraction of the time to cook since you do not have to tenderize the tenderloin. I used cornstarch to thicken the broth and cut down on calories. I ended up making 10 servings!!!! Guess who froze a lot of stew for future dinners !
Speed Racer comes out in a few days. I can't wait to see this movie. My younger brother and I have a thing for this Japanese Cartoon. I drew him a picture of Speed when he was in college and he actually put it on his wall. Now his kids have it on their wall. I found a Mark 4 at toy store one day and mailed it to him much to his delight. We have been talking about this movie as a family affair ever since we heard they were going to make it. I wonder if they are going to have any of the original music. Ok, this has nothing to do with dieting, but just thought you all might want to know what a sucker a I for kid movies. I love em. This one will hold a special place in my heart for all the family stories that will go with it. So, have a good week everyone.