As the group of ladies went around the room and answered the questioned, " how do you handle pain and disappointment," I realized how similar we were in our response to pain and yet how different. Yes, we all did different things, but the pattern was the same. We all first went to our addictions to handle pain if we were from addictive personalities, eating, smoking, drinking,drugs, bad behavior, anger, etc. Then we expressed some kind of emotion to that behavior and third would either retreat within ourselves or lash out to our children or spouses or some one close to us. Does this sound familiar to anyone ? I realized my reaction to pain and depression was typical as a food addict. First I would reach for food to east the distress, then feel horrible about myself, even get angry at myself for doing it, then yell at the kids or hubby if around if they were unfortunately around at the time. Unfortunately what got me eating in the first place was something the kids did in the first place or hubby didn't do and made me mad, or something someone said that hurt my feelings or some situation that was seemingly unbearable to me at the time, so I ate. It was a revolving door at the time. A pattern that would take years to break. Now as I heard these woman tell how they dealt with their pain ,I realized that the two years I have been on this diet I have had to face my denial about how I dealt with pain right in the face. I have had to deal with this enemy in order to be successful with dieting. I had to learn why I over ate and when. When I hit those painful moments I had to deal with them. I could no longer cover them up. Those emotions I pretended didn't exist, did. I had to deal with them. If they dealt with my relationship with my hubby, then they were going to have to be resolved sooner or later. Thankfully, by God's grace these are being resolved with a happy ending. Those emotions I needed to get worked out within myself like self loathing, are being worked out too. Self anger, getting worked. I'm actually becoming my best friend now, because I faced up to my denial and started addressing that to lose weight I must face the issues behind the weight. Maybe it is because for me, becoming heavy was a direct result of emotional problem and not biological malfunctions within my body. Sure, I had diabetes, thyroid problems, and was on cortisone for 18 years which could aid in weight gain, but for me, I truly believe my emotions led me down that slippery slope of weight gain the most. I believe for most of us it is here were we face our greatest battle. So today, as you conquer your own battles, remember, that denial is one of your worst enemies. It will keep you from your goal quicker than not staying on your calorie target because it touches at your heart.