Tuesday I am going into the hospital to have some hernias repaired. I'll be in there for 4-7 days (hoping closer to four) because the hernias are along a vertical incision that goes from my sternum to my belly button and they're going to cut out the entire thing.

So pretty much, Christmas and "holiday fun" was to be this weekend. I am signed up for a marathon tomorrow. We planned to get a hotel room, have a great carbo-loading dinner, and maybe see a Christmas movie. Tomorrow Roy was going to cheer me on and I was going to run an easy, relaxed marathon. On the way home we planned sushi. I specifically chose a marathon this weekend because I will be unable to run for six weeks, and I know me. I get depressed and I wanted to have something that I did right before going into the hospital to remind me that my body can do great things.

So today I woke up a little achey. I wasn't hungry, which was strange. Finally ate about six hours after I got up. Was feeling totally achey by the time I headed out to get my nails done so I took three Tylenol. It hit about half hour later, and an hour after that completely wore off. Aches, pain, and just plain misery. Made it through the appointment with everything hurting so bad that even my clothing touching my skin felt like someone rubbing me over and over again with a brillo pad.

"Hankreatitis." I am SO tired of this! Once again, I'll probably DNS a race because of my pancreas. No one can tell me what's wrong, although I do get "You probably just have the flu." Bite me. I know what flu feels like, and this is not the flu.

The hope is I'll wake up tomorrow and feel fine. That happens quite often, in fact. I believe I get a temporary blockage in my bile duct (it had to be rebuilt because I had surgery to have part of my panc removed in 2003), that backs up causing high fever, pain, and depression. (Yeah, depression...makes sense since the endocrine system is involved.) I just want to cry.

It's not the end of the world, but this just sucks so I am whining here because laying on the couch, taking Oxycodone, and moaning is about all I can manage right now. What pisses me off the most is that I spent all year having TONS of tests and nothing came of it. Sigh.

This is going to be the fifth or sixth time one of my races was impacted THIS YEAR! I always tell Roy "I know it's silly to even say this, but it is just NOT FAIR. I work so hard on my health and fitness and I feel like my body betrays me once every 4-6 weeks."