NIKKI8's CalorieKing blog
Wednesday, May 30 2007 - BFL Week 10 Day 4
View NIKKI8's food & exercise for this day
Food Report
Not a good day today. But I learned a lot. I did well until I made cookies with my son. The dough had to chill in the fridge for a few hours (darn gluten-free cookie dough). I kept going to the fridge to eat a taste of dough. I had way too many "tastes". Then when we actually made the cookies (he loved using cookie cutters! It was his first time doing that), of course I had way too many cookies.
So in looking back over this, I realized a few things.
1. I am not experiencing the usual self-hate that I do to myself when I go off plan. I think it is because I have changed my plan to not focus on calories. And somehow I just know that I will get back on track. I think loosening up my plan is allowing me to get back on track easier. I don't know-I'm just glad I'm not beating myself up over it so much and I'm going to get right back to being healthy, but not depriving myself.
2. I realized the issues that caused me to keep reaching for that darn cookie dough (so dangerous to eat raw anyway). We are potty training and that is stressful itself. And I am really worried about his eating. He is getting even more restrictive and selective in what he will eat. Every day for the past week he's eaten yogurt for breakfast, pbj for lunch, and who knows what for dinner because he certainly won't eat anything I've made. He used to eat applesauce and I'm supposed to start my interventions with that, but lately he won't even eat applesauce! So worried about him.
So I think between those 2 stresses today where I felt like I had no control, I went to the fridge.
Not a good decision, but I'm glad I'm aware of it now so I can make better choices tomorrow.
Exercise Report
Lower Body Workout--was good. Hard to know if I have the right form with dead lifts. Those are tricky and good form is so important with those.
Daily Joy Report
I took a nap while the kids napped! I never do that anymore-it's probably been a few months since I've taken a nap, but I was so tired after staying up late last night.
I was going to write that my joy was that my husband brought me flowers for no reason. That was wonderful, but then he got nasty with me later and just ruined the whole thing. His tone of voice can be so condescending and rude. I am getting so sick of it. Another reason why I ate too many cookies in the pm. Wait, this area is supposed to be about joy!
Daily Grattitude Report
I have been praying to be set free from addiction to food and the whole unhealthy part of "dieting". I feel like God is answering my prayer by slowly showing me what works for me. I am so thankful that I don't feel self-condemnation today, but a quiet confidence that I will do better tomorrow.
Other Thoughts
I have a very busy day tomorrow. My MIL is watching the kids and I have my physical with my regular dr and then my appt with the counselor. In the evening I take my son to get a screening done. I also have to get things ready for the yard sale that I'm doing with my friends on Friday. I'm tired just thinking about it all. And my house is a mess. Ugh!
So my goals for tomorrow are:
1. Make healthy food choices.
2. Eat 2 fruits and 2 veggies.
3. 10 glasses of water.
4. Listen to self-talk cds.
5. Read health goals.
6. Cardio??
Not sure what I'm going to do for cardio. Something during nap time, but I don't know what yet.
Not a good day today. But I learned a lot. I did well until I made cookies with my son. The dough had to chill in the fridge for a few hours (darn gluten-free cookie dough). I kept going to the fridge to eat a taste of dough. I had way too many "tastes". Then when we actually made the cookies (he loved using cookie cutters! It was his first time doing that), of course I had way too many cookies.
So in looking back over this, I realized a few things.
1. I am not experiencing the usual self-hate that I do to myself when I go off plan. I think it is because I have changed my plan to not focus on calories. And somehow I just know that I will get back on track. I think loosening up my plan is allowing me to get back on track easier. I don't know-I'm just glad I'm not beating myself up over it so much and I'm going to get right back to being healthy, but not depriving myself.
2. I realized the issues that caused me to keep reaching for that darn cookie dough (so dangerous to eat raw anyway). We are potty training and that is stressful itself. And I am really worried about his eating. He is getting even more restrictive and selective in what he will eat. Every day for the past week he's eaten yogurt for breakfast, pbj for lunch, and who knows what for dinner because he certainly won't eat anything I've made. He used to eat applesauce and I'm supposed to start my interventions with that, but lately he won't even eat applesauce! So worried about him.
So I think between those 2 stresses today where I felt like I had no control, I went to the fridge.
Not a good decision, but I'm glad I'm aware of it now so I can make better choices tomorrow.
Exercise Report
Lower Body Workout--was good. Hard to know if I have the right form with dead lifts. Those are tricky and good form is so important with those.
Daily Joy Report
I took a nap while the kids napped! I never do that anymore-it's probably been a few months since I've taken a nap, but I was so tired after staying up late last night.
I was going to write that my joy was that my husband brought me flowers for no reason. That was wonderful, but then he got nasty with me later and just ruined the whole thing. His tone of voice can be so condescending and rude. I am getting so sick of it. Another reason why I ate too many cookies in the pm. Wait, this area is supposed to be about joy!
Daily Grattitude Report
I have been praying to be set free from addiction to food and the whole unhealthy part of "dieting". I feel like God is answering my prayer by slowly showing me what works for me. I am so thankful that I don't feel self-condemnation today, but a quiet confidence that I will do better tomorrow.
Other Thoughts
I have a very busy day tomorrow. My MIL is watching the kids and I have my physical with my regular dr and then my appt with the counselor. In the evening I take my son to get a screening done. I also have to get things ready for the yard sale that I'm doing with my friends on Friday. I'm tired just thinking about it all. And my house is a mess. Ugh!
So my goals for tomorrow are:
1. Make healthy food choices.
2. Eat 2 fruits and 2 veggies.
3. 10 glasses of water.
4. Listen to self-talk cds.
5. Read health goals.
6. Cardio??
Not sure what I'm going to do for cardio. Something during nap time, but I don't know what yet.
5 comments so far.
5.
a decade ago
OMG on the passport thing I am trying not to have a serious meltdown about that .... there is a toll free number you can call to have your passport expedited if you are traveling in less than 14 days. We have been calling it all week and every time it is so full that the automated system just disconnects after the end of it's speech -- it doesnt even put you into a queue to wait or anything!!! I have tried no less than 12 times today! I am hoping that it will turn out alright and I am really trying not to be pissed at Kevin for procrastinating until April but it is hard!
:evil:
by CYNTHIALS
4.
a decade ago
Your blog today started as "Not a good day." ... but you know what, it sounds like it was a great day! You are really coming to peace and I can tell you are feeling better. It is sometimes hard to keep the right perspective on eating! It is refreshing for me to see that you are slowly making your way over that self-condemnation hump. I know how hard it is but you're getting there! Once I found my way over that it really made a huge difference in my attitude toward food and healthy living. Great job Nikki!
:thumbu2:
by CYNTHIALS
3.
a decade ago
Cookie dough is evil, I agree! That's one of my downfalls. I love to bake, but can't figure out how to do it without taking too many "tastes." Maybe we can figure this one out together. I need suggestions. I'm sorry that your son's eating is getting worse. That has to be so stressful. My son still has horrible reflux and it's amazing how an episode can totally ruin my mood and send me running for the cookies. I hope today is a better day!
by PJENA
2.
a decade ago
Cookie dough is
:evil: Can you find something else that he likes to use the cutters on, like sandwiches or cheese or something...Just a thought! 
:love: your thoughts though. 
:kiss: Have a great day today! 
:love:
by MOM22SONZ
1.
a decade ago
by BIGGRAMMA