Today's weigh-in brought me to a total weight-loss of more than 20 pounds. I feel great about this. And encouraged, because the habits for healthy living are becoming second nature — less and less am I tempted to overeat, or to be a couch potato. Some of this a "joy response." I feel joyful to be more fit than I have been in years, I feel joyful to find my clothes fitting better, or looser. I feel joyful to have energy for all of life's more interesting pursuits. Part is the "fear response." I am afraid to return to a life of pain. Physical pain – joint pain, pain in my feet, pain pain pain. Emotional pain — not dealing with my feelings makes my outlook seem like some dark toxic cave. It's better to just FEEL everything and deal with it than to put a DingDong snack cake on top of it!

More Spring Cleaning

Rearranging my home office for better use of the space, I'm coming across a treasure trove of things.

Wishful things: My continuing practices with Hebrew. I have worked so hard to learn biblical Hebrew but I have no public place to practice the skill. Periodically, I try to make up an exercise or two that will help me retain the skill. Last year I decided that writing out my own copy of the Psalms in Hebrew would be good practice. I got through one psalm, began the second, and there my notes petered out.

Keeping a journal, another wishful thing. Though I kept a journal for more than 30 years (started in January 1974 as a 12-year-old's new year's resolution) I found that my journal keeping had devolved into a place of whining about what I didn't have in my life. I set the journal aside in July last year and haven't picked up another one yet. I found a published guided journal for positive spiritual growth that I hope to use to develop new habits in journal writing. Maybe that will be my May-resolution. Start it on May day.

Organized my art supplies, remembering how much pleasure creative pursuits bring me. Want to make more time for my own creativity, and spend less time watching DVDs. Though I do so love my movies and documentaries.

Employment

Really unhappy at work this week. Just feel like our names are "Sisyphus," condemned forever to put out i.t. fires, and never have any meaningful progress or change. Or is that just the nature of technology and business in the 21st century? At any rate, tried hard to examine the way that I work, my organizing skills, and my priorities. I see places where I can change and perhaps get better results. Something to begin trying. Because misery at the place where one spends 40+ hours weekly is not a good thing.

Mystery Fiber

Started using a product called Teeccino about 2 weeks ago. It is a coffee substitute with no coffee or caffeine in it. But it is dark, rich aroma-ed, and full-bodied. Very satisfying to the palette as a mid-morning beverage with my snack, as an early morning pick-me-up with skim milk, or as a late night treat (also with a light snack) – or even by itself. This beverage naturally contains the carbohydrate inulin. (Yes, that is spelled correctly.) Inulin is naturally occurring in root vegetables, and high in chicory root. Some tout inulin as the next great diet product, some as evil secret food fiber dumped into the processed food supply.

An article that tries to balance the information: http://www.naturalnews.com/022356.html

A general informational piece from wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inulin

Personally, the extra 2 to 6 grams of fiber I get daily from Teeccino seems to make my digestion better. But the warnings sound ominous. Don't think I'll increase my Teeccino or try to find other ways of including inulin in my diet. And, I've only been using the stuff for about two weeks now. Not really long enough to see any long-term changes.

Salmon Theology

Just placed a book on hold at the library My Story as Told By Water" by David James Duncan. Before I was religious (involved in religious organizations), I called myself a "spiritual ecologist." This fellow seems able to blend his Christian background with his love for the environment. The review I read has me curious about how he balances both in his life. Since I am still growing and learning in the Christian faith, and all of my faith is informed by my heritage (Judaism), and my experiences (feminist, ecologist, etc.), sometimes I feel a little bit odd in the Body of Christ. But my truth says "The Spirit The Moves Through All Things" welcomes me wherever I go.

One review of the book: http://www.nimblespirit.com/html/my_story_as_told_by_water.htm

Bye Now want to start the rest of my day, exercise in this spring time day that threatens snow, and enjoy some free time.

Shalom alechem! -otter