This morning I wrote: "I wept before because middle sister had died. I weep now because I know she is lost to me." I think I'm understanding / accepting / grieving that there will be no new connections or sharing with middle sister in this earthly life. Some tell me there will, but those will be from my side only. There are times I feel inconsolable about this loss, it is humongous and incomprehensible. Did we humans accept and understand death in different ways when death was more acceptable as a part of the cycle of life? I think of mothers who gave birth to many children, but may have been lucky to have one child in five reach adulthood.

This is a big place of wrestling for me -- accepting that there is so much about a lifetime I cannot change, do not like, and just have to live with. Gracefully -- at least that is what I aim for.

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Glad to see my URSULA7 back posting!

Diaried my food yesterday in hardcopy. And walked for an hour yesterday. And felt like I made better choices around sugar.

Considering what I've put on "hold" since returning back to my home state but not yet having a home to live in. And considering what I can add back to my life, since it may be next month before I have real home base again. What I want to add in: regular balanced exercise program, food diary, seeking ukelele lessons... that's a good start.

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Shared with someone new what CalorieKing is, and why it has helped me to successfully lose weight. That was helpful. To see and understand what has worked, and what I want to return to, to accept and appreciate that last year was a good year of accomplishment for me.

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That's all for now. Love, -Otter