I took two days off from work this week. Today and tomorrow. Originally reserved the days thinking they'd be helpful in getting me moved in and then I could be all swift and file paperwork. But my needs are different than I'd imagined they might be, and I'm moving at a pace that unfolds daily - instead of my usual style. [Usual: plan, make lists, follow the lists, adjust daily or weekly as the case may be.]

Great about today: I'm making my space my own. More boxes are empty, I'm making meals for myself, I took time to write letters and sit on my balcony, I visited the library and took pictures of a my neighborhood in the beautiful autumn twilight.

Missed the mark today: Cookies were one of my major food groups. I got on line and responded to work e-mail (I really wanted not to think about work at all for these few days).

Looking Forward: It is going to take some time to find me again. In pulling things together and beginning to decorate, I came across some old things I used to embelish my home before I married. I tacked some of the images up, but didn't feel any resonance with them (or even with the memories of the times when they were posted). But new things are stirring. I sat outside, listening to weather and watching the day unfold for at least an hour today. That time did my spirit so much good. Something better is on its way.

God's voice?: Before my middle sister's death, in my faith journey, most days I had conscious awareness of God's presence - speaking to me, influencing my choices, guiding my perceptions. A benevelent presence that ran through all things, and all my experiences. That influence had disappeared from my life for a time. Tonight I felt the start of the return of God's presence. Tho' I don't think it is the return. I think it is finally that I am well enough, still enough, calm enough to recognize what is always present. For this I am profoundly grateful.

Grateful too for all the many ways friends, strangers, family, and colleagues have shown kindness, caring, and support during this - the "year-of-many-changes." Peace be with you.