I've pushed myself to the brink. I knew it when I tried to run this morning. I probably should have taken the run outside but as I'm trying to work on staying at a constant speed I took it to the treadmill. During the first interval of week 4 of podrunners it got real ugly in my head.

Real ugly.

Nothing I was doing looked right. I'm sure I looked the same as always but for some reason it was just a super gnarly girl up there looking like she didn't belong. I made myself run at least 1.5 miles before stepping off and finishing out the hour on the elliptical.

That didn't last for long either.

After about 30 minutes I just wasn't into it that much. I've been pretty gung-ho up to this point since joining but today I could have cared less about being there. I was definitely working up a sweat but not in that "RAWR" kind of way that I like so much. I switched to sit-ups on the BOSU ball. That actually was pretty good: 50 sit-ups with 5lb ball. Sort of a RAWR moment.

Next

Luckily I had an extra hour today so I did what any girl trying to lose 100 pounds would do. I swam. That was the high point for sure. I got in a full mile. I worked on speed as well as distance so it was a good session.

However during this swim I decided to make a declaration of sorts. I've officially decided this weekend is a NO GYM weekend. I hear everyone telling me to take a break and while I don't like to admit being tired, I am. I'm not saying I won't work out but if I do it will be in the form of running outside, or working out in the yard. I won't be packing up my gym bag tonight or Saturday night and heading to the gym the next morning. Saturday I have an all day workshop in Seattle that prevents me from sleeping in but Sunday I will not set the alarm. Sunday I will just let the day take me where it's supposed to go.

So there it is my official declaration: NO GYM this weekend!

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It's Friday. Time for the week in review in preparation for tomorrow's OWiS #17. Last Saturday's weigh-in was spectacular...225.6. However by Monday it had gone up to 228 and it's been a pain in the ass getting it back down. This morning it was down to 226. So potentially there could still be a loss but at this point I'm not really too freaked out about it. I think I know the problem. I'm not eating enough...crazy right? My net caloric intake has averaged out this week to be about 500 - 600 after working kcals into the equation. I'm down to eating 3 meals a days with no snacking. This is a major accomplishment. Now I need to work on getting those 3 meals up to par on caloric intake.

That being said, let's review my week!

Saturday - After OWiS #16, I went to the gym and ran a personal best in distance: 3.22 miles. It was freakin awesome! It was so awesome I swam for a mile.

Sunday - Hard to believe but it is possible to have an Elliptical Epiphany. I blame Eminem and realizing that my closet needs to be cleaned!

Monday - Met with Superman and discovered planks.

Tuesday - Just a Tuesday on the Elliptical.

Wednesday - I was angry / sore but I got the job done.

Thursday - 3 kick ass things happened to me. Including beating the crap out of boxing bags and winning over the brick wall.

Friday (today)- I ran, I ellipiticalled, I did sit ups and then swam my patootie off! Funny too, as I was leaving the gym this morning I ran into Superman. He asked me what I did this morning to which I replied: "I ran 1.5 miles, got on the elliptical for 30 minutes, did 50 push-ups and swam a mile"...he looked at me, smiled and initiated a high 5...word up people!

So all in all a pretty good week. My first 21 day challenge with SeattleRunnerGirl also ended this week. My challenge was to pack my gym bag and veggies every night before going to bed. I succeeded with flying colors. It helped my level of stress so much that I'm pretty sure it's a habit by now. I decided to do another 21 day challenge: Drink 99 oz of water each day. I'm actually shooting for a gallon but 99 oz seems more doable with weekends. Here's to lots of trips to the bathroom!

Fingers crossed I see a loss tomorrow but if not, I just keep on truckin!

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One of the things that frustrated me today during today's run that wasn't, was the way I looked in the mirror. My clothes are too big. I look frumpy. I don't own a sports bra and while I'm not that endowed to begin with my girls are starting to suffer. I made a little side trip to Kohls before work and lucky me there was a big sale going on. I even bought work out clothes out of the women's department. To know me is to know I shop in the men's section since no one ever really taught me how to shop for woman's clothing. I did buy 3 plain t-shirts in the men's department ( L size which is a new territory for me) but I also walked away with (from the woman's department) 2 new sports bras and 2 new work-out pants both capri style that are nylon so no more baggy full length running pants.

But since this is a NO GYM weekend, I'll have to wait until Monday to wear them

See you all tomorrow!