Seriously you’re going to need it.

To know me is to know that up until 7 months ago I was a severe introvert. So severe that going out with people who I considered my good friends was difficult for me to do. It started when I was a small child during elementary school. I wish an adult had intervened when they saw me in kindergarten throwing a tennis ball up against the wall day in and day out, alone and removed from the other children during recess as this would become a daily practice for the next seven years until I went to junior high school. As I became a young adult, I would have one or two friends that I hung out with and that was it. I knew everyone in school but only in the context of sharing a classroom together. Going to school / work became my social outlet. I considered my co – workers some of my best friends but when they wanted to leave the confines of work, I froze. I passed up housewarming parties, birthdays, weddings…you name it, I missed it.

Five years ago, World of Warcraft became my social outlet.

I paid $15.00 / month so that I could log into a virtual world and be connected to other people without the social anxiety of having to face them in real life. It started out simple enough. I played for an hour here and there. By the end of the first month I was playing upwards to four to five hours a day. By the end of my fourth year playing, I could easily spend ten to twelve hours a day during the weekends. I would get up two hours early on work days just to log in for a bit and get that social fix that I needed. I was more comfortable interacting with a fantasy world than I was interacting with the world around me.

I’m changing that.

I’m taking myself way out of my comfort zone on a daily basis because this LCJ just isn’t about losing weight. It’s about making Life Changes to becoming a healthier person: Physically, mentally and emotionally. For some people it really is just about losing some weight. A little change in the diet and add some exercise and that person is on the path to success. For me, if all I was doing was changing my diet and adding some exercise, I would fail miserably. Every decision / choice / thought I make / have must be done consciously. Even those decision / choices / thoughts that seem to keep me from moving forward. I’ve had some bad days. I’ve had some days where I needed a serious reality check but I’ve learned to stay in the moment and then move on. I don’t linger any longer on what I did to fail but rather what I can do to succeed. One bad decision / choice / thought is a) not bad and b) just a decision / choice / thought.

One of the hardest parts of this LCJ is leaving the fantasy world (the proverbial tennis ball/wall) and putting myself out into the real world and learning how to be an active part of my community (I’m the adult intervening now). I’ve met some pretty awesome people along the way and get to share my story with some of them.

Yesterday I shared my story with Abe.

I’ve watched Abe for quite a while at the gym. He’s a very heavy man. In the beginning he would get there super early in the morning and head straight for the treadmill. Hoodie and all. He wouldn’t make eye contact with anyone. Come down the stairs, step on the treadmill, look straight ahead and then immediately vacate the premises when finished. The cool thing about Abe? He comes back day after day. He hopped on that treadmill for close to two months and just recently started working out with a trainer. Yesterday’s workout with the Godfather was especially brutal. Halfway through our hour together I needed to take a lap around the gym to get my sh*t together and I noticed two things about Abe:

He was using a weight machine.

He wasn’t wearing a hoodie.

I walked past him and thought this is the moment I’ve been waiting for. I turned around, walked up to him and said “I’m really proud of you for not wearing your hoodie in here. I know it’s a hard step to take and I just wanted you to know that I know it’s a hard step to take“. He laughed and said his trainer makes him take it off and that he didn’t think anyone would notice.

Oh I noticed all right.










I didn’t have much time to talk to him because Godfather wanted to get back to kicking my ass like no one’s business but we exchanged names and that brief but very important acknowledgement that we’re part of the same battle. Every time I see him now I’m going to make sure to say hello. He doesn’t realize it but he’s a soldier in my army now.

An Army set forth to save my life.

To save his life.

To save your life.