ROCKMOM2's CalorieKing blog
Saturday, Oct 4 2008 - Sharing some info
View ROCKMOM2's food & exercise for this day
Our life at home is in a very strange place. My 16 year old daughter is receiving outpatient treatment for an eating disorder. We figured out she was having binge/purge issues after she had been treated with an antibiotic that caused her to vomit daily. When we cleared up the reaction to the med...she continued to purge.
My precious child has had issues with body image since she was 10-11. I feel I probably contributed to these issues just because I have yo-yo'd her entire life. She has never worn above a size 6 jr. in pants, but has always been very short...she is 5'1". I have never seen her as "fat" or even large. The past 2 summers she refused to be seen in our pool by any of her friends. When friends came over, they would "accidentially" get in the pool with their clothes on/jeans and all. She refuses to eat lunch at school or even sit in a mall food court and eat. She thinks people are watching her and thinking "look at how much she eats".
I don't know what to do at home to help her. We have only been in therapy a week, but I feel so helpless.
I have been a very controlling mother and my husband is a strict father. How do we turn that around if it is what caused some of these issues. Our 22 yr old son is at least 80 lbs overweight. He is a senior in college and I am scared for his health. His girlfriend is also at least 80 lbs overweight. I tell him frequently that I worry about his health, but I don't know what else to do to help him.
I am involved in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) and the study this year is on Moses. I amazed how it is leading me to become more compassionate instead of so controlling.
CK is also helping me align lotz of things and realize I am such a control freak it has really hurt lotz of issues in our lives.
Anyone out there that can relate and give me some words of encouragement would be sooooo much appreciated. I feel terribly alone in this quest of wellness for my child and working at the same time to improve my health while running her across town 3 times a week to therapy/body image class/dietician. Hubby is very supportive, but is such a "fixer" that after 27 years of marriage I sometime don't discuss the thing hurting my heart...it hurts him too much that he can't "fix" it.
Wow...this does feel like a safe place to open up and be honest. Thanks to anyone who is there.
My precious child has had issues with body image since she was 10-11. I feel I probably contributed to these issues just because I have yo-yo'd her entire life. She has never worn above a size 6 jr. in pants, but has always been very short...she is 5'1". I have never seen her as "fat" or even large. The past 2 summers she refused to be seen in our pool by any of her friends. When friends came over, they would "accidentially" get in the pool with their clothes on/jeans and all. She refuses to eat lunch at school or even sit in a mall food court and eat. She thinks people are watching her and thinking "look at how much she eats".
I don't know what to do at home to help her. We have only been in therapy a week, but I feel so helpless.
I have been a very controlling mother and my husband is a strict father. How do we turn that around if it is what caused some of these issues. Our 22 yr old son is at least 80 lbs overweight. He is a senior in college and I am scared for his health. His girlfriend is also at least 80 lbs overweight. I tell him frequently that I worry about his health, but I don't know what else to do to help him.
I am involved in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) and the study this year is on Moses. I amazed how it is leading me to become more compassionate instead of so controlling.
CK is also helping me align lotz of things and realize I am such a control freak it has really hurt lotz of issues in our lives.
Anyone out there that can relate and give me some words of encouragement would be sooooo much appreciated. I feel terribly alone in this quest of wellness for my child and working at the same time to improve my health while running her across town 3 times a week to therapy/body image class/dietician. Hubby is very supportive, but is such a "fixer" that after 27 years of marriage I sometime don't discuss the thing hurting my heart...it hurts him too much that he can't "fix" it.
Wow...this does feel like a safe place to open up and be honest. Thanks to anyone who is there.
3 comments so far.
3.
a decade ago
*Wraps you up tight in a warm hug of understanding , support,and mutual affections *
If I ever felt there were a Soul Sister in the world for me - it MUST be you Vicki. The world we live in is just a mess - so trying hard to take care of the part we can live in and those who live in it with us - is a daily battle. I fully appreciate and understand what you are going through sweetie. Health in the heart/mind is just as important ( if not more so ) as health in the body - so interconnected they are. As a parent we feel its our duty to " fix " or " control the environment " of our children from birth - and beyond. Once a parent - ALWAYS a parent.
I admire your courage to write so openly and want you to know I am here for you as much as you need ~ and you and your family are in my thoughts.
Sometimes the hurt - means we are finally healing - and that is a very good thing.
by EMERALDROSE
2.
a decade ago
I mentioned in the thread about the book that a counselor recommended called "Father Hunger: Fathers, Daughters and the Pursuit of Thinness" by Margo Maine, PhD. One of my twins has had problems with binging and eating in the middle of the night, and also body/image issues. I think the book will help you to understand....it did help me. I actually bought the book for her to read as well (she's not a teenager). You shouldn't be blaming yourself - one of the things that she talks about is how it is a global problem, and what your husband's role is, etc. It's an excellent book. And I will say a prayer for your daughter.
:love:
by BUN201
1.
a decade ago
I wish your sweet child well as well as you and your family as you struggle to bring it all back together again. A dear friend of mine daughter was diagnosed several years ago with an eating disorder and I saw first hand what her daughters eating disorder did to her and the family. Just keep loving her as you do, finding and providing the support she, the rest of your family and you need, talking about it with others and praying. She too is struggling now as well. And remember, I know things seem a little shakey right now, but God is just trying to steady your hands so that he might fill your cup.
:angel4:
by JAXS