New after pic(s). I 'em. Not to be vain, but w w Yea, I probably shoulda closed my closet door, but oh well!!

Well, it's actually just boring. Nothing too exciting going on over here. It's crunch time with finals week looming around the corner and there's PLENTY for me to do. I have 2 1/2 papers to write tonight. Luckily, I've already written the big paper, i just need to proof read it a few more times to make sure it's Denita-quality. Im pretty worried about 2 of my classes that i've kinda slacked in this quarter. Hopefully I can pull off some kind of a miracle. One of my professors is absolutely looney and she scheduled our final for the same time as another one of my finals so I'll have to talk to her about that. She's such a doofus. Two more classes. Two more classes.

Anywho, I had a GREAT BIG breakfast today that didn't necessarily break the calorie bank.

1 cp. potatoes o'brien

3 sausage links

1/4 cp scrambled eggs [substitute] w/reduced fat cheddar cheese

1 svg. of grapes

Calorie Total: 412 cals; 14.2 g fat; 13.1 fiber; 775 sodium ( )

So I was fairly excited about that. Now I'm just kinda sitting around my apartment getting the after picture itch. This AM I weighed at 233.6 & 232.8 and now that I'm finally below -60, I'm antsy to take another pic! Maybe I can get my friend or roommate to take a pic of me so I can gain some additional motivation. I've been fairly motivated this week though. I think it's because I'd eaten everything under the sun that I thought I would ever crave in my natural life so I have nothing left to want! I think about this process now and the one thing that's totally different is that, regardless of how many times i may "fall off", there is no quitting . Maybe some rough patches, but no quitting. I actually enjoy this process at times. I like to know that I'm making good choices. I like the feeling after a good workout (even though half the time I don't even feel like going to the gym to begin with), it's really not that bad.

The only thing that will continue to be my biggest down fall is NOT the food: it's myself. I am my worst enemy. I tell myself I can't succeed and that I've blown it and I'm a failure. But then reality kicks and it says, "Denita, you've already lost 60+ lbs!! You've worked hard to get where you're at. If you can do that, you can do anything". I need to realize that I will be at this for the rest of my life. And one thing I also need to realize is that I should stop thinking about the future or what I'll look like in May or in August. As long as I keep going at this, one day at a time, it will eventually be May and it will eventually be August and I will look FABULOUS. So, I tell myself, just stay the course. It will eventually be the day when you've met your goal and every setback is for a reason. I read in one of the forums the idea that losing weight is like climbing a mountain and sometimes you stop at "base camps". Taking a break is OK. You (and your body) need to get acclimated with the changes going on inside. I'm going to continue to try to tell myself I am worth this fight and that I've already gotten half way there.

I will be a success story.

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Alright, enough self-righteousness/motivation pep talks to self. I'm tired, I'm ready to eat lunch, and I hate my roommates. They just stress me out by existing. However, i might use one of them so I can be vain and take pictures of myself. I you all!!!

note: i'm going to take another after later because the background is too busy aka too messy.