My husband and I are meeting with a financial counselor to seek advice on whether or not we are candidates for bankruptcy. It's not an option that I want to consider but I just don't know what else to do. We have over 15 medical creditors that we owe for my husband's one-month hospital stay last year. We simply cannot keep up. Not to go into too much detail... but it's just heavy. And I feel the weight of it!!

I tried all the tricks in the book and I finally just decided to sit down and pay the darn bills. I was avoiding it... I feel better now that I have paid them... but it's just such a stinky feeling knowing you can't shell out the money that you owe without avoiding another bill.

We are able to pay the "important" bills like the mortgage, electric, etc. But the medical bills and our other bills that can get put on the wayside. For example, with Christmas last month.. we hardly paid any of the medical bills. And yes, they started calling us...

My husband suffered from severe depression last January and had a 4 week hospital stay. Part of his stay was without insurance. He also "lost" his job and was unemployed until March. He started working part time in March and has worked 20-30 hours ever since.

Of course, I am a teacher in the LOWEST paying district in our area. To say that I am paid "LOW" for a teacher means that I am paid pretty dang low. This is one of the main reasons I went back for a master's degree... more school = more pay. But of course going back to school (U of I) costs money too. So I started working part time as a photographer at JC Penny.

All of this and we still can't make ends meet... I owe $380 for my FALL class and I can't even register for the class I am currently starting until I pay that balance. I have yet to call to see if they will even work with me.

Our finances have never been this bad and it is just all adding up. To make matters worse, my husband's tax form said they held $2 for federal. TWO DOLLARS. How does a huge mistake like that happen? We were really counting on tax money and to have to pay would just be awful.

July 2008 my mother died of a Fentanyl overdose (accidental) and she had no life insurance. She was 51... and I was the only child, and my father had passed away 26 years earlier. Of course, I haven't paid much to the funeral home or the cemetery yet... shortly after she died and I was nearing the end of my grieving process, Ed was hospitalized.

The drug that killed my mom has been found to be at fault and (the pain patch) actually leaks to release lethal doses of the drug. I have been speaking with a lawyer for a year now and we may have a case filed soon. I am hopeful to recover at least enough to pay the funeral... anything more would be a complete blessing.

My faith is being tested... a year ago my husband and I were baptized and we have been maturing in our spirituality. But lately I feel far from God. I am sure it is not because of him, but because of me. But in this situation it is so hard to see where he will provide... but faith is believing even when you can't see....


~ Raeanne