Good morning! I'm not sure how I feel about yesterday, my emotions were everywhere. Let me start by saying my day ended nicely; my youngest asked if she and the Grandpuppies could sleep over because her boyfriend was visiting his family out of state and she didn't want to be alone at her house...it was nice to have her home...I miss her.


Earlier in the day I was stuck at work, almost missing my Chiro appointment, hate that. My Chiro was able to get me preauthorized for the MRI, they said the insurance should be calling me this week. I decided to take the Abdominal X-ray I had done last Friday to see if it showed him anything that would help him because the X-ray tech said it showed some of the coccyx bone.


Well it looks like I swallowed a 2 lb London broil...it's actually that shape. My colon (the upper part) is distended and huge. Not to be gross but you can also see all the excrement in the intestine...it was scary. He said I wasn't anatomically correct, that it should be more in the shape of an U and mine took a shortcut straight across. He said he wouldn’t be surprised if the GI doctor put me in the hospital for this and asked me how I was functioning. I'm a bit freaked out now and hope the GI doctor got the report today, I'm hoping to get a call from her today because I’m really nervous now, about what it looks like, what it can be, the area that is distended is solid black and different from everything else, is it a tumor, cancer (she said it was possible), more importantly will it rupture, will I be able to get it cleared out? I just need answers and relief!


I talked to my niece who lives at Mom's house with her three kids and the buyers backed out. My sister's realtor listed the house as having city water, sewer, natural gas and Central AC and it doesn’t. At one time it did have central AC but the head unit has been broken for years. So this is both good and bad news; good because she had nowhere else to go and basically had the door slammed in her face by various agencies (my sister tried for her to and received the same treatment) and the bad...we have to come up with $1,479 for the taxes now that were due on 8/10 and the bank can still take the house and lock my niece out, plus the cold weather is coming and they use propane.


The whole situation sucks, I've been so wrapped up in the doctors, my situation and journey that I guess I checked out for a little while. I really don't know how to feel, I have a lot going on but I'm not thinking about stress or emotional eating; honestly, I'm a little afraid to eat because of what I saw on the X-ray.

I now wonder if it's all the stuff inside me putting pressure on the nerve rather than the spine putting pressure on the nerve and then causing the Bowel issues. I'm trying not to let my imagination get the best of me but even I knew it wasn't right and shouldn't look like that...It almost looks like the intestine is a little twisted.


If I don't hear from the GI doctor by lunch today I'm going to call her office. I also find out today if the pharmaceutical company will pay the majority of the Linzess medicine prescribed, if not I can't take it, I just can't afford $179 per month to have a normal bowel moment...I will need to find other alternatives. I can't believe I'm turning 44 in October and I'm dealing with this but I am taking responsibility for my health now and that is more than I have don't in the past.

I was thankful my youngest daughter (23 years old) asked to spend the night last night, you can’t really focus on your negative stuff when your kids are around, I really missed her and was happy to have her home for one night.


Well, fingers crossed I hear something today.


>>>>>>>>>UPDATE>>>>>>>>>>>

CAT scan tomorrow morning. This will tell us everything including if a colonoscopy is needed.