Ok so now with the bronchitis and being on the oral steroids again I was terrified of gaining weight "as usual" but I'm actually down again, breaking 180...178.9 lbs!!!! I guess changing my eating habits really is making all the difference with the oral steroids. I will be on them for two weeks total, so hopefully I can maintain or gain no more than 5 lbs...last time I put on 15 pounds.

I'm still stressed with the current situation in my life but this morning proved to give a little reprieve of what I will eventually have to deal with head on and I'm grateful, for me and for others involved. I think the current arrangement proves to be the best case senerio for today even though it is not the long term solution we are all wishing for. I know enough to see a positive in it and be grateful for it despite how badly it breaks my heart.

The anxiety is oddly a little less today, not sure if it's just the medicine building up in my system and helping me more or if it's just a little relief of this mornings outcome. I'm not sure, maybe it's both.
All I can say is I'm getting up every morning, taking a deep breath, trying my best to do the best I can for that day in every aspect of my life and if I fall short I'm cutting myself a break...I've got so much going on its a wonder I'm getting out of bed at all.

But once again, I bow my head to wind and push through the storm because that's what my family does. We keep moving forward despite what life throws at us, a trait passed to me from my parents and to them from theirs and I have also passed it to mine. Generations of stubborn people (lol) refusing to give up, give in or be beaten. We are survivors and always will be!