I don't really know what happened to me over the last two weeks......I just basically blew off logging my food and exercise and have eaten pretty much what I wanted. I worked out sporadically and without purpose...doing it because I was used to, not really focusing. So of course, because the scale may not tell the whole truth all the time, it definitely will let you know when you've been a slacker.

The last two weeks have shown me a slight weight gain and I recognized that I've been slipping back into old habits.

I have learned that:

1. The 'self' didn't go away. Instead of urging me to quit working so hard, she's changed her tactics. She's been lurking behind the scenes insinuating that a slice (or two or three) of pie won't KILL me. Putting it into my head that it doesn't matter what I eat, I will work it all off any way. When it comes time to work out she puts it to me that I worked out so hard the day before I don't need to work so hard right now. She convinces me that I look great and I don't have to be so uber intense anymore.

2. The "self" is a lying and deserves no credibility whatsoever. I obviously cannot trust my other "self" she will get me into trouble every time.

This is heartbreaking. It is heartbreaking because I don't think there will ever be a time when I can believe that I'm going to be ok with trusting myself about my eating issues. Most of it is common sense and I KNOW that. But it bugs me that I can tell myself the things above and I believe it.