WHORLEDCRAZY's CalorieKing blog
Thursday, May 26 2011 - What I CAN do
View WHORLEDCRAZY's food & exercise for this day
I rode my bike today 11 1/2 miles.....to the gym, worked out, then rode home. It was a 23 mile round trip bike ride plus the 4 mile elliptical that I did at the gym. I did good today. It makes me feel good to say that. I love it when I feel good about myself. For so long I didn't and it's amazing watching myself fly. I can say that I did good today. I can own it and not feel like i'm bragging. I don't think I'm bragging. I'm just owning what is.
I wanted to say that when you depend on other people to give you that feeling, it never comes. A feeling like that can only come from your inside, the willingness to do good, to try to good good and change yourself, make yourself better.
I used to try and get my happiness from my husband. If I wasn't happy then it was because I wasn't getting his attention. If I wasn't happy it was because the people around me weren't "feeding" that need to be loved or liked. I'm understanding so much more that my husband is NOT responsible for my happiness and neither is anyone else. It's me. It's always been me....I can make myself happy and I don't need anyone else to validate that.
I know everyday won't be like today, but today will carry me into tomorrow and help me realize that I can pretty much do anything I want to do and that feeling of accomplishment, the feeling that makes me fly, makes me independent can only come from my heart and my soul.
That "self" person that I've written so much about in the past.....she keeps getting quieter and quieter. The more I do the less she tells me that I can't do it. She also doesn't tell me too much that I'm wasting my time either. That kind of all went away when I got the bike and started riding. The harder I try, the more I do the quieter she gets.
Riding my bike has helped me push myself further, harder, faster than I've ever done before. My body is thriving and not just the physical part of it either. It feels good to "own" my accomplishments. It takes a lot to get where I am....I know it's going to take a lot more to get where I need to go.....but I AM going.
That really is the point isn't it? That I'm going. What's even more is that I won't even be the same person I was or am now when I finally get there. I am kind of excited to see who I end up being when it's all done.
I wanted to say that when you depend on other people to give you that feeling, it never comes. A feeling like that can only come from your inside, the willingness to do good, to try to good good and change yourself, make yourself better.
I used to try and get my happiness from my husband. If I wasn't happy then it was because I wasn't getting his attention. If I wasn't happy it was because the people around me weren't "feeding" that need to be loved or liked. I'm understanding so much more that my husband is NOT responsible for my happiness and neither is anyone else. It's me. It's always been me....I can make myself happy and I don't need anyone else to validate that.
I know everyday won't be like today, but today will carry me into tomorrow and help me realize that I can pretty much do anything I want to do and that feeling of accomplishment, the feeling that makes me fly, makes me independent can only come from my heart and my soul.
That "self" person that I've written so much about in the past.....she keeps getting quieter and quieter. The more I do the less she tells me that I can't do it. She also doesn't tell me too much that I'm wasting my time either. That kind of all went away when I got the bike and started riding. The harder I try, the more I do the quieter she gets.
Riding my bike has helped me push myself further, harder, faster than I've ever done before. My body is thriving and not just the physical part of it either. It feels good to "own" my accomplishments. It takes a lot to get where I am....I know it's going to take a lot more to get where I need to go.....but I AM going.
That really is the point isn't it? That I'm going. What's even more is that I won't even be the same person I was or am now when I finally get there. I am kind of excited to see who I end up being when it's all done.
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