The air is so thick today
not just for me
but for anyone
who tries
to take a deep breath
of fresh air
they won't find any
not today
not on
a day like today

i went with my contractor
to the stone quarry
ok, not really a quarry
but the stone store
sounds silly
i was sweating bullets
a fish out of water
me in my aqua capris
and sandals
surrounded by
construction workers
hot, sweaty
built to last
wearing tool belts
and work boots
the grime of the day
already visible
and it wasn't even 10 AM
too hot to work
if you ask me
but then again
no one did


it's jungle hot
oppressive
dank
humid air
coating the skin
curling the finest hair
challenging the fittest
compromising the weakest
it could be worse
i guess
at least
the sun is filtered
by thick, grey clouds
that compress the air
even more
taking the joy
out of a walk in the park
a day at the beach
oh, it seems
nothing is fun
on a day like today
absolutely nothing


now i am home
in the cool of my kitchen
sipping coffee
reading blogs
writing my blog
and debating
whether or not
i will go outside again
at least for today
the comfort of my ac
too appealing
to leave

even ralph
still sleeps
i don't know
what time
he came in
but it was late
later than usual
no golf for him
i suppose
and he'll golf in
almost any weather
almost any time
but not today
not a day like today

as cole porter
once wrote
really said it best
"it's too darn hot"
too hot to do anything
even the birds
and the bees
are lazy today
and the thought
of exerting any amount
of energy
seems daunting

so today
i will stay inside
and play
i'll work out later
upstairs
in front of the tv
walk away the pounds
with leslie sansone
and her sistas in sweat
who barely sweat
and she talks through
the whole thing
never breathless
never once
i want to do that
someday
but certainly
not today
no, not on a day like today
no way

when ralph comes down
he’ll go to deciccos
for me
our little family market
but really not so little
down the street
convenient
in a pinch
everything you need
right around the corner
friendly
neighborly
cool

i need ground turkey
white meat
not just lean
to make
my turkey burgers
which i will grill
later on
when the sun goes down
and after the rain comes
because i know it will
you can feel it in the air
the air
you can't breath
on a day like today