luckily, i am able to access a computer today via my parents' tenant who happens to be my sister's mother-in-law. i didn't want to trouble her to access her computer, but i am going to stay here another night so i needed to get on line. i am not sure if it's really a want more than a need, but here i am.

i have been eating dunkin munchkins like they are manna from heaven. i bought 60 yesterday; for my parents of course. naturally, i have eaten 10 to every one they've eaten. they don't really make me feel better, but i can't help myself. at least right now under these circumstances.

i know i am not the only one dealing with stress and emotion in their life. i know i am not the only one with aging parents who turns to food looking for comfort and finding none. but i do feel a bit lost these days. i know the dust will settle and the running around will decrease, but for now it is what it is. and i have to do better at managing myself while caring for others.

the new pain management doctor wasn't any help. he was nice enough, but felt my mother's treatment needs were beyond his field of expertise. he referred me to two other doctors who could work in tandem to benefit my mother. One is a neurologist pain management specialist and the other is physiologist. both are more familiar with geriatric care and pain too. they work out of the same office building so that will make things easier too. unfortunately, i couldn't get appointments until february 13th, so we'll just have to cope until then.

i have a weigh-in today, but no scale. i think i will take the fifth this week and enter the same weight. it's the best i can do for now. ok, i don't want to overstay my welcome on the computer. i hope everyone has a great weekend. i'll be back....