Feeling panicky and irritable the last couple of days. Short tempered. I am not sure if this is PMS or other hormone rollercoastering or me not taking my medication regularly enough. I'm going to be consistent w/ the pills and see if that helps. I am so looking forward to my trip with Stephie, but maybe I am anxious about it as well? I don't think so, but perhaps.

Watched Will at a soccer game yesterday. I probably shouldn't do that - because it breaks my heart. With soccer, he is a harder worker, but not a natural athlete, and a bit of loaner. I know he is doing well academically and socially at school, which is great, and which I have to remember. But sometimes my heart just feel so raw about him.

Ellie is doing well - she is so well rounded. Smart, usually hardworking, kind, and funny, and social. I thank god every day that she doesn't start puberty - like I did at 9 years old. She's only 8, but I hope so much it happens at a humane age for her. I worry a tad that she is as active as she used to be, but I think part of that is just be a bit more internally focused.

I have really been enjoying long runs on the weekends. Yesterday the kids and I went to a trail, Will biked, Ellie rollerskated and I ran.

Same weight for the last 9 days. I am no where near where I'd hoped to be for this trip, weight-wise, but I'd like at least another drop before leaving on Saturday. I am in much better shape than I was 2 months ago, so that is good. I certainly feel better physically.